What Becomes of the Broken Hearted?

I have never had a blog before, but I feel like there are some aspects that I understand about it. I feel like the point of blogs are to display your thoughts, so, as so many people have done so before me, I will do the same. Recently, my girlfriend and I broke up. It was not over a fight, or because of someone cheating on the other, we mutually broke up because we both felt that it was the right thing for us to do at the time. I will admit that it was not easy as we do care for each other very much and our attraction and compatibility came very naturally as well. However, she was willing to put more into the relationship than I was, because I simply do not understand the concept of love. It seems very robotic, I know, but I guess it started when my parents started fighting and there was a divorce scare when I was 17. Everything that I thought love was kind of came tumbling down as every fight grew worse and worse. It just was not a good time for me to be in the relationship, and she very much understood that. She is very special, so I am thankful that when we get time alone from each other to get ourselves back on our own feet, we will still try to be friends.

It's weird, but thinking about all this breaking up stuff sparked an idea in my brain. This idea of parasites connecting to our lives has driven me through a loop inside our classroom. We are parasites. We feed off situations and we react accordingly. Of course, there are thousands of different reactions. What I am saying is that our emotion, our instincts, our plan of action, all falls upon what happens next. If we hear music, we dance or tap out feet. If someone says something funny, we laugh or giggle. If someone dies, we are sad and maybe cry. If we lose a game or are called a bad name, we get upset or angry…maybe furious. We react to situations, and our reactions spark other reactions. We are a never-ending chain of constant action to reaction, situations sparking our emotions.

When my girlfriend and I broke up, I was upset because we both cared for each other but we also knew it was for the best. The situation called for me to be upset therefore I reacted to the situation, as a parasite would react to its host. The parasite feeds off the situation at hand. And it is not only verbal communication of the reaction, it could also be body language, facial expressions, any form of expression the body is able to produce.

Tonight at rugby practice, I was mentally distraught because of the break up and with issues between my parents; yet, I focused my energies into anger, aggression, and energy for the practice. I was focused on what I was doing because my anger was fueling my body to perform well. This situation can call for this reaction or different ones. In class, we viewed the beginning clip from a film called Slackers where a man speaks about how in his dreams, he can see the realities of the paths in life that he did not choose. He explained it like when Dorothy meets the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz. The Scarecrow points in multiple directions, but they choose one specific path. The man was stating how in his dreams he could see the outcomes of the other paths he did not choose in his life. I focused the way I did because, in my life, I have chosen and built my personality around focusing all my bad energies and using them in the situation that they can properly be applied to. Anger  Rugby. On the other hand, someone different could have just been distraught, losing focus, and thus having a bad practice.

We are all very different in that all our past situations and reactions in life, whether they be sharing your snack during lunch with someone without food, or being the class bully, or beating up the class bully, or learning valuable lessons, shape who we are today. We are all parasites in the sense that we have grown up reacting and learning from our environment and situations. I hope that we will learn to look at the world through different eyes. Sometimes we need to take a step back and look at the paths that are laid before us. We can be so easily manipulated by television, social networking sites, politics, that we react at first emotion. Let us begin to analyze the world around us and learn from our past.